This Friday finds me:
Exhausted.
Emotional.
Strangely okay with both of the above.
It has been quite the week (or two). I’ve slept so very little and done so very much. And in the middle of all of this work I’ve tried so very hard to find a few moments with the girls. There haven’t been enough of those despite my efforts.
Today we met up with E’s buddy O, and sent her on her way for a long weekend of swimming and fishing at the lake. She did this last year as well, and had a great time. His family is like family to us, so we don’t worry while she’s gone. But we still miss her, and think of how quickly they are all growing and expanding their circles. O was in one of her first “circles” though – and I love how they circle back to one another with such ease, even as they grow. Here they are this time last year. Definite growing.
F was sad after we dropped E off, and didn’t want to go to school. She wanted to come to work with me, and cried when I left her. I know she’s been missing me – she doesn’t realize that I sit and stare at her sleeping body for long minutes each night. The other morning she heard me downstairs and yelled down to me.
MOMMY? You are HERE? You are REALLY HERE?
That’s a hard way to kick off another sixteen hour work day. I tell myself that I am here. A lot. And I’m not always so busy and running around like crazy. We carved out so many fun times last weekend and we’ll do the same this weekend. I’m so looking forward to a lazy Saturday morning with just my little one. I miss that time with her. I miss her sister, and am already looking forward to Sunday afternoon when she’s back. I miss my own sister, especially as I think back to ten years ago today as I stood and watched her walk down the aisle in such a beautiful ceremony. I’m a little wistful as I think of all of the changes in those ten years since, and the four beautiful children we have between us. I’m emotional and exhausted and that’s okay. Sometimes it takes that to force me to slow down and appreciate those quiet moments and make time for more of those. I’m looking forward to sharing some of those moments here as well.
Hope this Friday finds you well and ready to enjoy a quiet moment or two.